Sibling relationships

I'm not referring to my sisters, I want to talk about the relationship between my 2 children. There are five years between them. This picture is one of my favorites of them from 1992. It sits on my vanity. Leah was almost 1 year old and Derek would have been almost 6. He REALLY loved his little sister back then. Derek always wanted to help out with her and was ever watchful over her. He always held her hand. I knew things would change as they grew older, I just never understood how much! This weekend he took his little sister deer hunting in the wee hours of the morning. She had been begging to go for weeks. I thought it was very sweet of Derek to do this for and with his sister. Leah of course, froze to death. She told me the entire deer stand was shaking from her shivering. Derek finally offered to bring her home, even though they hadn't had much daylight time to look for deer. He was compassionate about the entire deal. It gave me those warm fuzzy feelings to hear them chatting away like friends, instead of siblings. I know there are still days ahead where she will get on his nerves, they will have their squabbles, etc. But at least I got a glimpse into the future on Sunday morning to see how it possibly will be one day down the road. It also made me realize how much they are growing up. I know there will be that time ahead where they grow into close friends, sharing holidays, births of their own children and so much more. Leah looks up to Derek, however she is also very jealous over the fact that he gets to do so much more than her and a lot faster than she can do those things. She doesn't see the years that separate them, she only sees that there is a difference. Their father is an only child. I was pretty content with having just Derek for several years. When I was growing up, I'd always thought I would have at least 2 children. Yet, once I'd had Derek and was fortunate enough to stay at home with him for his first two years ~ I realized I would be fine with having just him. Those thoughts changed when their Dad's father passed away. I watched him dealing with his loss and his frail mother pretty much on his own and with me. I began to rethink having another child, being the oldest of 3 myself. So we decided that we would try for number two; hence them being a bit further apart than I would have originally planned when thinking through our family. Both of my children are very different from each other. Each have made me learn new things about life and about myself. I am thankful for each of them. And this weekend provided me with the knowledge that in the years that lie ahead, they will be there to help take care of each other. That gives me a great sense of peace.

Super Mom ?

Why in the world is it that we put SO much pressure on ourselves to be Super Mom's or should that be Super Everything to Everyone?
I know that I have tried for years to be a 'Super Mom'. I've worked outside the home since my oldest was 2 years old. Still managing to multi-task my life every day. Luckily I've always worked an 8 to 5 job. I've always said that I left that job to start the 2nd shift - doing all those Mommy duties. Pick up the kids, race home to make dinner, assist with homework assignments, attend the band concert, or soccer, karate, dance practice, etc and more!
I would think that things would have slowed down a bit at my house with one off at college and just one here, but they really haven't. This weekend I thought I was going to have a bit of leisure time; however, it is 10pm on Sunday night and I still didn't get everything accomplished that I wanted to finish up. I did have a busy weekend though - Friday night I came home from work to find my son home with his bag of laundry. I did get to have dinner with a friend. Both kids attended a local football game. Saturday morning I got up and did sip coffee while checking out 2peas. Then I got ready and went to a Rare Breed Dog Show in town. Quick lunch at Chick-fil-a, errand to Verizon to have my daughter's phone repaired, a stop by a department store for my base makeup and a great buy on a dress jacket for work. Gotta LOVE those sales and a combo of a gift card I hadn't used yet. Home to watch a rented movie with a friend. Doing laundry in between it all. Sunday was an early morning with the kids coming in from deer hunting. More laundry, then grocery shopping. Oh joy! I really don't care to visit the grocery store. I've gotten to the point of trying to make it an every other week 'chore'. Lunch was picked up on the way back and late afternoon at that. Help with a homework project. Call from my sister - fair warning that my mother was on her way over - frantic quick sweep of the house. Mom stopped by to show off pictures of her recent 14 day trip up north and brought us some trinkets. More laundry (mine finally!). Call from my son back in his dorm tonight.
I made some AWESOME caramel popcorn, recipe compliments of Sophia C's blog (the link is on the left here). The student workers will be happy campers tomorrow at work! Thanks Sophia!
More laundry (does it multiply like rabbits at your house too?). Loaded the dishwasher.
I really wanted to get some scrapping time in here somewhere but it just didn't work out. Maybe next time!
I put so much pressure on myself to 'do it all'. I have learned to give myself a break every now and then. If it doesn't ALL get done, then there is always tomorrow.

I've seen this 'super' syndrome in my son too. He tries so hard to visit everyone that wants to see him on the weekends he is home - me, his dad, his girlfriend, his buddies. He has even mentioned trying to keep up with everyone and everything. I'm glad to know that at least every now and then he slows down at college and slips in some afternoon naps.
So the thought for today is don't forget to stop and smell the roses!

Heirloom .... Heritage

This old chest was passed from my grandmothers estate to my father. When my mother sold our childhood home, she moved into a small apartment and didn't have room for all of the furniture and such. This old chest now sits proudly in my living room. I've always loved this chest as it sat in my parents bedroom filled with handmade quilts that kept us warm in the winter. I have no clue where it came from originally. My father passed years ago and with him any information that might have been known about it. It used to have leather handles on the ends which have worn away. Someone told my sister that it could be worth a good bit. However, to me it is only of sentimental value; I would never sell it. The chest was really the only thing (besides pictures) that I wanted out of my childhood home.
My grandmother was really quite the character. She had 'henna' red hair until she died, when I was a child. In today's terms she would be described best as a very imaginative 'drama queen'. Often fraining some illness to get my father or uncle (her only 2 children) to drive one hour from their homes to see her. Only to smile when they arrived. She had 'won' the game. She had an old time name ~ Hattie Mae. Which I have been called throughout my growing years by my mother when we had disputes; due to the fact that my mother and her mother-in-law did not see eye to eye often. I also inherited her 'auburn' hair.
Tonight Leah was having to write a paper about a 'character' in her family. To also tell a story.
Here is a story I told her about my grandmother: My father played football in high school. He actually was the captain of his football team. Apparently at this certain game, he was running the ball when he was tackled by an opposing team player. My grandmother standing on the sidelines, proud I am sure to be watching, ran out onto the field and proceeded to beat the other player over the head with her umbrella because he had tackled her son! Obviously Granny didn't understand the rules of football. I laugh everytime I hear this told. It speaks volumes about my grandmother's personality. She was a short woman, with red hair and the temperament that goes with it! She was something else. When I was a teen, I would get ill when my mother called me 'Hattie Mae', because I knew it was because mother never got along with her very well. Now, I'm a bit proud that I am really a lot like her. Strong, not afraid to speak my mind, sassy, proud and supportive of my children and thankfully not quite looney enough to beat someone over the head with an umbrella ~ yet. *wink*
Every night when I curl up in my recliner to relax after a long day; I sit across the room from this trunk. Not only is it filled with blankets, but it is filled with memories.

Mother & Daughter time....

Mom and daughter time is very important. Much more so in my house where my son is the oldest and there is 5 years between my two. "Derek gets to do EVERYthing" is often heard here. He IS almost 19 (yikes!), in college and pretty much on his own to an extent. So yes, he gets to do a lot of 'everything'. Leah on the other hand, is almost 14, in Junior High and still very much too young to do a lot of things. So it feels like to her that her brother gets to "get away with" more than she does.
Yesterday, she and I spent the day cleaning and de-cluttering the house. She was a big help and we achieved a bunch! I now have my living room and kitchen area back to an organized manner. I'd let things slide a bit getting ready for the arts & crafts show. So the junk mail had piled up and things just seemed in disarray. Leah even swept off the back deck and tidied it up without being asked. Then we both pitched in and cleaned the kid/guest bathroom. I made taco's for a late lunch/early dinner meal.
After all of our hard work, I decided she and I needed a 'treat'. So we both showered and headed to town. First stop was by Blockbuster for some movies. We haven't rented any in a while so there are always several 'non-seen' movies to pick. We settled on 'Monster-in-law' and 'Miss Congeniality 2'. Chick flick movies! We headed from there over to the local Diary Queen and grabbed some chocolate treats. Mmmmmmm good!
Last night we watched 'Monster-in-law'. It was fun to just relax and enjoy a movie together.
Her brother came in right after we had finished up viewing the deleted scenes. He was full of tales of the mornings deer hunt.
I really can't relate to being a 'younger' child and feeling the things that Leah feels from being the 'baby' in the house, because I was the oldest growing up and got to blaze the trails of life first. I didn't have those 'left out' or 'too young' feelings. So I am trying to be mindful of hers. She however, likes to make that as difficult for me as possible! *LOL* I love that she is very much her own person, however her 'attitude' gets between us often. We work on it constantly. I try to hear her out and she really does try to curb it at times.
I think it is very important for us to have our 'girl' time - doing something fun - like movies and a treat. She is also a big help, when she is in the right frame of mind. There have been many discussions about the 'difference' there is between her and her brother. Maybe I do expect a little more from her. Derek is easy, non-confrontational - has always applied himself to school work with very little followup. Leah needs more direction, but is argumentative ~ always needing to get that last word. I think it has to do with clashing hormones!
I've told her just again this week, that I really want us to have a close relationship to merge that friendship and the fact that I am STILL the 'parent'. It is an ongoing project. I enjoyed our team work effort yesterday and the 'girls' fun of the evening. Hopefully we are making strides.

Touched by a kindness.....

I have to share my experience today. It's a beautiful Saturday in the south. Cool breeze, sunny skies and I got to sleep in. Earlier this week one of my co-workers called me up and asked if I would like a free ticket to a BBQ being held at a church just up the road from my house. I said, sure. I thought it would make for a great Saturday lunch for me, as both the kids had plans to be busy with activities. (Leah is hiking with a school outdoor group today, Derek is hunting deer in the woods with his buddies). I planned on a leisurely day, doing laundry and a bit of housework. I sipped coffee this morning while checking out my yahoo group and 2 peas. Then started in on my college son's laundry. I tided up the house a bit and then got ready to go pick up lunch.
I drove out of my neighborhood across the main highway and then down the little road to the Methodist church having the BBQ. I was greeted by a gentleman that said I could DRIVE THRU to pick up my order. How cool is that!?! I was met by a pre-teen sweet girl with a smile that asked how many plates I wanted. I said "well, I have a ticket, I guess that is for one". She said "Oh, you can have as many plates as you would like". To which I replied, "then I will take 2". Derek had just arrived home from hunting and I figured he would enjoy a plate also.
I drove up in the line as the same smiling girl brought me my bbq plates and a grocery bag with 2 small bags of chips and 2 slices of cake. I was SO touched on the short drive home that my eyes teared up. This tiny country church is not having a fund raiser, they are having a bbq. They are giving plates away to anyone that drops by. What a fantastic act of kindness in today's world! And what a wonderful witness this old tiny painted white country church on a little hill is making to others, not just their church family ~ but to anyone that comes. Especially right now when everyone's funds are tight. I thought about how blessed I am. Even though I don't have a lavish home; I have a cute small house that suits my family ~ me, my son and my daughter. We have a roof over our head that is cool in the summer and warm in the winter. We do have food in the frig and the cabinets. I thought about all of those in the world today that are hungry. Those here in the US and other countries. Those that have suffered the pain of devastation at the hands of mother nature recently.
Not only did I have a 'free' lunch today, I have also been invited by my previous co-worker to her families house tonight for a get together. Just some other co-workers, family and friends. Her invite said she knows how crazy life gets close to the holidays, so they decided to have a 'Fall Fling'. I so miss working next to this wonderful lady! It will be fun to hang out and just enjoy the company tonight.
Both small acts of kindness. Both VERY touching to me. How blessed I am to be surrounded by a great community of people.
I plan to make thank you cards this evening or tomorrow to send to the church and to my co-worker. I hope that in some tiny way they will receive a blessing due to their kindness that has blessed me.

An Old Farmer's Advice

Someone sent this to me by email today. I LOVE most of them and how TRUE they are!
I have a 'country' friend that has 2 sayings, I think I will add:
"I'm milking this cow, you just hold the bucket" and
"Loose lips, sink ships"

Enjoy~

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. * Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance. * Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. * Words that soak into your ears are whispered ... not yelled. * Meanness don't jes' happen overnight. * Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads. * Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. * It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge. * You cannot unsay a cruel word. * Every path has a few puddles. * When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty. * The best sermons are lived, not preached. * Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway. * Don't judge folks by their relatives. * Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. * Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time. * Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none. * Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance. * If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'. * Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got. * The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'. * Always drink upstream from the herd. * Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. * Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in. * If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. * Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Arts & Crafts Show experience....

My very first time exhibiting (sounds better than being a 'vendor') at an Arts & Crafts Show was this weekend. It was some more experience! I took off my full time regular job on Friday to set up at the show site. Mother Nature did NOT cooperate as the sky opened up and released a much needed rain. However, that is not the perfect show weather! I sat up a canopy tent and tables in the downpour with some much appreciated help from a friend.
Saturday morning I crawled out of bed BEFORE my normal alarm clock time to get ready. I woke up the girl child wrangling her into some cheap labor. We arrived at the site (which was in the country, middle of the woods beside a cow pasture - used for parking) at 7:30am to find out that the grounds were entirely too wet to drive to our booth location. It took 3 trips luggin' stuff down into the woods for set up. After wiping down the wet tables, we put out the pretty matching pale green table clothes, set up signs, then filled the tables with my scrapbook crafted items and photographs. A co-worker is a great amateur photographer and shared the booth with me. I have to THANK so many of the wonderful 2pea scrappers for so much inspiration on many of my items! It was cold and damp, but thankfully not raining. The day went well, with a bit of a slower foot crowd than I have seen in the past while visiting this show. By the time the show was over for the day (5pm) I was still cold, very tired with aching feet! I came home and made a pot of coffee just to warm up! Sunday was another day of the same. It was a tad bit warmer with a larger crowd.
There was a very friendly lady in the booth next to mine who sold quilts and homemade jellies. She has shown for years and was full of advice. I think I finally met someone that talks MORE than I do!
All in all, I can say it went well. It was something on my "100 things to do" list and now I can mark it off. It is a LOT of work and hard work at that. From being a hermit for weeks before the show frantically making items to standing on your feet and smiling all day, two days straight! LOL
I may do another one, I will just have to wait and see. I am really interested in knowing how my contacts from the show work out.
My mother, who is traveling Canada and New England with an 'old folks tour' called both days to wish me well and see how it went; which was a pleasant surprise. My sister and her children stopped by, along with many co-workers and friends. It was nice to be so well supported by them. Even if it was with words of encouragement!
Now I can slow down a bit, work on Christmas cards/gifts and maybe even have a lazy weekend!

My Hurricane Katrina 'relief' story .....

Today one of the student organizations were selling those colorful wristbands for Hurricane Katrina relief. The wristband is my favorite color, 'blue', so I purchased one. It brought back the memories of my weekend working with the hurricane victims. I work full time for a University. When the 'powers that be' heard about the plight of so many fleeing the ravaged areas of Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama they set into motion to open one of our old dorms up as temporary housing. I was lucky enough to volunteer and work that first weekend as tired people made their way to our location. I was touched by the appreciation of the people I have been in contact with, by their stories. Today, our student newspaper again told stories of students who volunteered and about the lives they touched and how their lives were touched.

I know sitting in front of my tv watching it all, I felt so helpless to be able to do something to help. I know many many others felt the same from the OVERWHELMING community response we received when the word went out that we were opening a shelter. It was amazing. It was touching. I was touched.

I am sharing a quote from the news article today by Ralph Waldo Emerson that sums it up ~
"It is one of the most beautiful compensations in life, that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself."

Almost there....

I set a goal when I decided to enter the local Arts & Crafts show. I wanted 'x' dollar amount of sale-able inventory. I am almost there! In fact I have 5 projects still in the making; once they are complete, I will have made it. I've given up free time; I've stayed at home like a hermit for several weekends in a row; missed out on a few 'fun' things....but I will be able to say at the end of this week and the start of the show that I made 'goal'. Hopefully, the hard work will pay off!
I fixed chicken and dumplings for dinner tonight - a HUGE batch. So now I don't have to worry about dinner plans for a few evenings and can concentrate on getting everything finished up. I still have to make a few table signs - One for custom orders, a couple of prices (because I don't want to put a sticker on some things). I also have to print my order forms. After that it will be down to loading up the vehicle.
List - I probably need a '2 do' list. I am a list maker. Worse as I have gotten older. LOL I like to go to the grocery store with a list - then fly right through knowing what I need without having to 'plan' meals in the store. If I have a big project at work or even like the show, I usually do a list. I was in my daughter's room today and noticed she has a '2 do' list push pinned on her door! All for it, IF she would just accomplish the items on it. Cleaning her room should be near the top, right under Homework assignments.
That is the update for today, time to get ready for bed - that is after I can find the bed. I scrap in my room and right now all of my 'projects' are all over the bed.

I am thankful to call her a friend.....

Who? Well her name is Sophia Corbridge. I've known her for years now, mostly online. However, I actually had the pleasure of meeting her in person in Atlanta a few years ago. She is as delightful in person as her posts online. I don't think I could come up with just one word to describe her .... hmmm, genuine. Even that word doesn't convey it. She is thoughtful, caring to the point that you actually can FEEL it even through words typed on a computer screen. She emailed me this morning. Just a few lines. Simple? No they were words of praise and encouragement, about 10 short lines. Those words made me tear up. I felt like Sophia had reached out and given me a warm, loving bear hug from across the miles right into my OWN living room sitting in my computer chair. Just when I needed a little lift, there it was. Amazing huh? Yes, she is amazing! Talented .... anyone in the scrapbook world knows she is without question talented. (and I get to say I know someone 'famous' ! *giggles*). A wonderful story teller - the kind that pulls you in and makes you hold on to the last word. She is a lady - a southern one at that! Just happens to be transplanted to Utah. I know that if I ever make it to Utah I could knock on her door and be welcomed in like one of the family - she just has a way of making you feel that way. In fact, I've told her before that I would love for her to adopt me! LOL She has shared so much with me and others that she has, in my mind, broken the 'stereo type' that I had of LDS. I know so much more about her religion, that I have come to respect it. Being from a southern Baptist upbringing that is a lot! I admire her and her generous spirit.
This is just a tid-bit of what a great lady Sophia is to me and so many others. I am thankful to call her a friend. When I "grow up" I hope others will see in me just a tad of what I know others, including myself, see in her.
Thanks Sophia, for the kind words, YOU brighten my days.